Nerds of Steel

The New American Nerd Is a Beast! Former Four-Eyed Wieners Are Suddenly Ripped, Cut, Pumped, Absy, Hairy and Huge! Why? ‘It Involved Applying Biology to Real Life,’ Says One

This article was published in the March 31, 2008, edition of The New York Observer.

Buff Nerds: Why are former concave-chested <br />proto-geeks like Conan O’Brien suddenly <br />super-cut, ripped, pumped?
Drew Friedman
Buff Nerds: Why are former concave-chested
proto-geeks like Conan O’Brien suddenly
super-cut, ripped, pumped?

“Ben looks like Beaker from the Muppets on the outside, but then inexplicably like a guy from Prison Break under his clothes,” said Mindy Kaling, the 28-year-old actress who plays Kelly Kapoor on The Office. “I think if I’m going to have a boyfriend who works out, he better be sort of embarrassed about it, like Ben is. Sheepish fitness is the only tolerable kind.”

Ms. Kaling’s boyfriend, the 30-year-old writer Benjamin Nugent, is the author of American Nerd: The Story of My People, which will be published by Scribner in May. He works out every morning at Crunch in Fort Greene, and the timing of his book seems impeccable; the bespectacled Urkel-esque weakling of yore has, of late, become more concerned with free weights than pocket protectors. Daniel Radcliffe, who can seamlessly switch from playing the nerdy Harry Potter to being naked onstage in Equus, vies with cheesecakey High School Musical star Zac Efron as the object of teenage girls’ affection. Steve Carell shocked audiences (and Catherine Keener) in The 40-Year-Old Virgin with his tight abs. New York actor Justin Theroux, currently starring as John Hancock in the ultra-nerdy HBO miniseries John Adams, has flashed his surprisingly ripped torso on Sex and the City and in the Charlie’s Angels sequel, Full Throttle. Clark Kent, Peter Parker and Bruce Banner are all buff nerds of our imaginations. Slightly closer to reality, there’s Conan O’Brien and, some might say, our former governor, who was famous for his 5 a.m. runs through Central Park.

But today’s nerdy beefcake poster boy would have to be Jason from this season of Beauty and the Geek, the CW sleeper hit that attempts to bring this brain-meets-brawn fantasy to fruition by making the aforementioned geeks more self-aware, if not super-pumped. “My face, hair and personality all scream to the world that I’m a geeky guy who sits behind a desk all day long,” Jason wrote in an e-mail. “However, my body screams that I’m a huge gym rat who only thinks about going to clubs and beaches. This usually leads people to believe my head has been ‘superimposed’ on my body.”

It’s not rocket science to understand that it’s paradoxical for someone to be both nerdy and buff. Perhaps no film has captured this tension better than Revenge of the Nerds, which laid bare the scary aggressiveness of the jocks as they tried to assert their dominance over the nerds—who eventually outwit them thanks to their intellectual skills, not their muscle. In his book, Mr. Nugent argues that this film, among others, highlights the ways in which nerds are seen as embodying technology, whereas jocks embody physical strength; nerds govern through reason, jocks through intuition, and so on.

“The pathos of being a nerd is to feel that because you are comfortable with rational thought, you are cut off from the experience of spontaneous feelings, of romance, of nonrational connection to other people,” Mr. Nugent writes in American Nerd. “A nerd is so often self-loathing because he accepts the thinking/feeling rift, and he knows and cares that other people accept it, too.” So in our popular culture, the male nerd has historically been not only an object of scorn and ridicule from other men, but has been unable to love. That’s why a show like Beauty and the Geek works; it’s unexpected not only for a beautiful woman to be attracted to a nerd, but also for the nerd to be attracted to the beautiful woman.

The buff nerd, however, is a kind of double agent, existing as he (and it is always he; female nerds can be “buff,” but that makes for a sexy librarian/Tina Fey kind of paradigm) does with his geeky exterior and chiseled interior, as Ms. Kaling noted, approvingly, about Mr. Nugent. Indeed, women often see these men as the best of both worlds. Jessica, a 26-year-old writer in Boerum Hill, recalled one college-era ex-boyfriend as a “skinny-jeans-wearing, seemingly emaciated art-school dude.” But he was not, in fact, emaciated. “I was shocked when his shirt came off to reveal washboard abs. I think it was sort of a response to being a total fucking geek in high school and getting picked on a lot.”

Hipster or Ripster?

Meanwhile, editorial assistants, aspiring literary agents and freelance writers crowd the streets of Williamsburg and Carroll Gardens, galley of All the Sad Young Literary Men by Keith Gessen (who also happens to be a buff nerd) tucked under their arms, Black Lips on their iPods, each one a more underfed mash-up of Elvis Costello, Chuck Klosterman and Stephen Malkmus than the next and trying, ever so valiantly, to appropriate the nerd aesthetic so that they may be Taken Seriously, and not be caught sneaking into the Cobble Hill New York Sports Club or the Greenpoint Y or Absolute Power on Grand Street in Williamsburg.

These are what Gary Shteyngart, in his 2003 novel The Russian Debutante’s Handbook, disparagingly called “glamorous nerds”: “They were a savvy-looking bunch, clothed in the new Glamorous Nerd look that was fast becoming a part of the downtown lexicon. One specimen in a tight, square, wide-collared polka-dotted shirt was shouting above the rest: ‘Did you hear? Safi got a European Community grant to study leeks in Prava.’ … Vladimir looked on sadly. Not only had he spent his entire life without winning a single European Community grant, but every pathetic piece of clothing he had been trying to shed since emigrating was now prêt-à-porter bonanza!”

These aren’t the gym rats of that 1977 Arnold Schwarzenegger documentary Pumping Iron, though today, some of them are secretly taking their cues from Men’s Fitness instead of n+1. In an e-mail to The Observer, Mr. Shteyngart noted that the “glam nerds” have “appropriated everything we real nerds ever had, but they look good too. Classic imperialism.” Next Page >

  • del.icio.us
  • Digg
  • Reddit
  • Newsvine
  • Google
  • Yahoo
  • Technorati
  • Facebook
  • Stumble Upon
  • Netvibes
  • Windows Live

Comments
Post a comment

Anonymous (not verified) says:

3 pages of NOTHING!

Anonymous (not verified) says:

EVERYONE in Hollywood knows that Zack is so gay,please!

UES (not verified) says:

Sh**ty.

Wow, I think Luke Stiles needs to go to the gym less and learn a few more adjectives.

UES (not verified) says:

Sh**ty.

Wow, I think Luke Stiles needs to go to the gym less and learn a few more adjectives.

scooper (not verified) says:

Anonymous (not verified) says:

3 pages of NOTHING!

^^^

Charles (not verified) says:

WHY DONT the hipster girls work out??? ONLY the hipster guys. lame

Anonymous (not verified) says:

am I missing something? what is wrong with being intelligent and fit?

Mr. E.B. Powers (not verified) says:

So, in summation: Status concious douchebags judge others to be status concious douchebags, want to look like those they judge to be status concious douchebags, but don't want to look like that type of douchebag, so they create lame meta-justifications for engaging in said douchtivity. As a book-reading,225 bencher(thats right-open pride!), I strap on my +12 armor of hypocrisy, climb one of the tallest towrs in the city, cry, "DOUUCHHEE!!!",and fling my body from the heights. Great C'thulhu rises from the ocean, the stars go out, and all chant Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn...

Anonymous (not verified) says:

this is a fun article but where the ladies at?!? we can be fits nerds too, damnit!

Anonymous (not verified) says:

this is a fun article but where the ladies at?!? we can be fits nerds too, damnit!

TongueUntied (not verified) says:

While this piece has a thesis, it is really half-complete.

I was at M.I.T. for about five years and I can tell you that the equation worked like this: Philosophers would rather lie and say that they were cabdrivers than admit to being Lacanian. And to support that argument that were frequently pumping iron when not doing proofs.

It'd be interesting to speak with a professional actor who has transformed his/her body for roles like Jared Leto (currently) or Christian Bale (frequently). How do their publics and circle of friends respond to their gain in muscle and/or fat, or weight loss to the point of starvation?

****I'm surprised why the "gay clone" of the '70s/'80s isn't discussed here. In NYC being gay and "in acceptable shape" is like being a personal trainer in other cities. Going from sissy to Muscle Mary is quite the journey.

-TI

Anonymous (not verified) says:

What a bunch of losers for being "embarrassed" of staying fit.

Anonymous (not verified) says:

To be precise, the expression is "cri du cœur". Note the "œ" which is a French specific caracter named "e in the o" («e dans l'o»).

Well, we ARE nerds after all.

Anonymous (not verified) says:

...isn't the only intelligent way to live to be fit? it makes you think more clearly, regulates your body, releases endorphines, extends life, and much more.

It sounds like this article missed the idea that those who go to the gym and get buff only to look good/attract the opposite sex are the douche bags, while most everyone else just wants to live healthy. Looking good is a fringe benefit!

Anonymous (not verified) says:

Ummm, so nerds CAN'T be gay- why, exactly?

SecretAsianMann (not verified) says:

So I get from this article that some Elitist Hipster Nerds apparently look down on other people for not also being Elitist Hipster Nerds. They claim that these non- Elitist Hipster Nerds care too much about how they look, but by doing so are showing that they themselves are actually the ones who care too much about how they look by working out in such a way that no one can tell they work out. Meanwhile, everyone else (including regular plain old nerds) are too busy enjoying their lives to spend even a second worrying about impressing these people.

My head almost exploded trying to comprehend their logic.

Browzer (not verified) says:

Wow, there was such potential for an interesting article about geeks who work out, as opposed to the pointless pop-culture references and anecdotes that appear in this article. As a software engineer, I definitely see a lot of guys in my field working out these days.

Anonymous (not verified) says:

Hilarious article. I have seen the disdain heaped on the physically fit by literary colleagues whose idea of a workout is having four tabs open at once (phew!).
I myself am grappling with opposing instincts: to park my butt in front of my computer all day in order to finish this script I'm writing, and to run to yoga class at every opportunity. Two very, very different things, intellectual and physical workouts.

Post a comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd><br> <p> <i> <b> <embed> <img> <blockquote> <span> <strikethrough> <u>
  • Use <!--pagebreak--> to create page breaks.

More information about formatting options

By checking this box you are giving permission for Observer staff to contact you to obtain contact information and permissions required for publication.