Magical Shield Erected at Hospital to Deflect Evil Paparazzi Rays Directed at Pitt Twins

The Lenval hospital in Nice where Angelina Jolie is preparing to birth the golden twins has reportedly covered the windows of her room with a "special material" that cameras cannot see through.

"It is impossible to see into Mr. Brad Pitt and Mrs. Angelina Jolie's room. So any pictures released are either posed fakes set up by paparazzi or they are pictures of other patients," the hospital said. "We hope this is clearly understood out of respect for all patients in this clinic. This is not Mr. Brad Pitt or Mrs. Angelina Jolie on them. The room is clearly different and their windows are covered to prevent such photos."

So quit making non-famous pregnant French women anxious with your obnoxious telephoto lenses and flashes, OK?