Fertility on the Tube: NBC Pops One Out
Admit it! Countless of you baby-mad Manhattan women have already TiVo’d Inconceivable, that show about a high-end fertility clinic (is there any other kind?) which premieres Sept. 23 on NBC. But those anticipating a sober probing of Petri dishes, a nuanced exploration of the serious issues that arise when doctors “play God” with syringes and semen samples, are due for disappointment. This ain’t Nova, after all, nor the Discovery Channel, but rather a formerly dominant entertainment network visibly straining to recapture ratings glory with a hot topic and a hot cast of truly uplifting diversity: The clinic’s staff, on which the show centers, includes at early count a Brit, an African-American, an Asian, at least one Latino, a gay man and the requisite smattering of bland blond bubbleheads. Inconceivable’s complicated DNA is showing: a little Ally McBeal, in its brisk and goofy office repartee and feminine orientation (remember the dancing baby?); a dash of Desperate Housewives; a bit of ER. Masturbation jokes and would-be moving after-school moments. Then again, maybe there is something apt in a show about assisted reproductive technology so blatantly displaying the committee thinking behind its own creation. Actor Jonathan Cake is the Brit, playing a handsome, press-savvy doctor named Malcolm Bowers, who performs daily gynecological miracles in a Los Angeles setting—all swooshing glass doors and plush furniture—more reminiscent of a luxury Ian Schrager hotel than a medical facility that in real life is surely one of the least-sexy places on earth. Family Options, as it is called, is under sudden threat of being shut down, not by right-to-life protesters (not in the first two episodes, anyway) but by a lawsuit from a furious white client whose surrogate unexpectedly gave birth to a dark-skinned baby after having unprotected sex too close to her scheduled embryo transfer. Inside the office, which attracts more than its fair share of total loonies, Dr. Bowers is a saintly authority figure, reassuring anxious female patients about their uterine linings (“thick and fluffy!”) in warm, plummy, Rupert Everett–esque tones; outside, he’s a callous pussy hound, bedding and swiftly dumping an attractive nurse named Patrice (Joelle Carter), who proceeds to plot a revenge dastardly enough for late-season Melrose Place, though the clinical setting of Inconceivable actually seems to allow for greater sexual permissiveness than your typical nighttime soap. Guess what? These two aren’t the only Family Options staffers bringing their work home with them. There’s Rachel Lu (played by Ming-Na from ER), the clinic’s co-founder, who herself needed sperm from an anonymous donor and an injection from Dr. Bowers to get knocked up; coming home from a soccer game, Lu Junior explains that he’s called “Frankenbaby” by his peers because “everyone knows I was born in a test tube.” Later, a Lilith Fair–type soundtrack plays as he pores longingly over his “father’s” meager file. There’s Scott Garcia (David Noroña from Six Feet Under), the in-house lawyer, who spends most of his time negotiating with his persnickety, paranoid boyfriend about parenting methods for their newborn (“I’m Daddy …. You’re Papa”). Most amusingly, there’s the late-breaking appearance of the husky-voiced Dr. Nora Campbell (a strenuously Crest Whitestripped Angie Harmon, late of Law & Order), one of Dr. Bowers’ exes and a maverick medic in her own right. Dr. Campbell is the kind of dark, powerful, straight-talkin’ woman usually introduced late in a series, à la Alexis Colby, to salvage it from potential doom; she was reportedly a last-minute addition to the Inconceivable cast, a sort of prophylactic measure. From the looks of it, the show is already being loaded with thoroughly ridiculous, only-in-L.A. story lines, like a Botoxed and liposuctioned woman who wants to use donor eggs, unbeknownst to her husband, because she doesn’t want to pass on her plump, plain genetic legacy to her kids. This is understandable: Despite its miraculous aura, fertility treatment tends to involve fairly mundane, methodic and microscopic procedures rather than blood-spurting life-or-death decisions, and it’s unclear whether such a subject can generate enough compelling dramatic scenarios for a sustained run in prime time. Will the creators have the courage to delve into the really scary stuff, like the possible links between repeated hormone therapy and ovarian cancer? (See the late Harper’s Bazaar editor Liz Tilberis’ memoir No Time to Die, for starters.) And why, on television, must pregnant women’s water always break somewhere inopportune and humiliating, like a supermarket? One can’t help flashing on Wallace Shawn in The Princess Bride: “In-con-theivable!”
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